Did you know that we are wired to be negative? Probably one of the easiest jobs in the world is to be a critic. You know why, it is in our DNA to first look to criticize and look for faults. Let me elaborate. There is little controversy on what most experts believe are our four primal feelings that influences our behavior. Some say five, six, or even seven different emotions but they all count these four fundamental emotions on their lists; anger, sadness, fear, happiness(joy). The other three emotions that are often listed are disgust, surprise, and contempt. Think about this carefully, all but one emotion is negative. Furthermore, there is something called negativity bias. Please do some research and find out for yourself. Basically, we are sensitized to negativity much more than good or positive inputs. You have doubts that this actually exist? Think about the last time when a family member or a friend mention all of the good traits you have but points out one or two things that you may need to work on. What do you remember? Your boss on you annual review tells you ten things that you do well and passively mentions one thing you can do better. What do you think you will focus on when you leave the office? That’s right.
Why am I telling you this? In order for us to get on the right path to a good balanced health and wellness, we all must understand why we react the way we do. Don’t be so hard on yourself. We are prewired to think negatively and also to be extra hard on ourselves. Its hard to try and stay positive especially these days of social media. There are so many “haters” out there. But in all reality, most of the haters out there really don’t like themselves and are also hurting on the inside. How do we avoid this pitfall. Simply, it is a choice. Knowledge is power and we all must empower ourselves by understanding why we make the unhealthy choices that we do. We have to grasp why we often go to the dark places in our mind that we know that are wrong. Some people call it self- destructive behavior. I call it preprogramming. It is much easier to be sad than happy. We naturally look for faults rather than to search for the goodness in others and ourselves. It’s simpler to tear down than to build up. When we look in the mirror, we naturally focus on the faults don’t we?
If you are reading my blog right now, you can make the conscious decision at this moment to begin the deprogramming process. The journey will be arduous but exceptionally rewarding. Once you make a concerted effort to make this journey, your view of yourself and the world will begin to change. Remember, one must heal thyself first before healing others. Place the oxygen mask on yourself before you assist others. Let’s go on this voyage together. We can grow, evolve, and learn from each other. Much more to come….